Another day in the life of.....

I know that life can be complicated at times, and people come and go, but seriously? In the past month I have met wonderful people, and I have met people I chose to forget. I will never understand why people have the need to lie about their lives to get attention. Are their lives just boring and they need to spice them up? I guess it's just a "emotional" thing for acceptance. I have taken a long look at my life in the last 3 yrs. In 6 days I will have been "sober" from oxycontin for 3 years!! Yay to me, right? After all that I put myself through in those years before I realized that I wasn't living the life I wanted, I needed to change. I still remember the day I got out of detox. My mom took me to her house up in Morgan. When I got out of the car, I turned and looked at the mountain and saw with watery eyes the beautiful fall colors. Literally my eyes started to water from the vibrancy of the colors on the trees. I realized at that point in my life, I NEVER wanted to become numb again. So here I am 3 yrs later, and still have kept strong. So I guess I'll top this post off with my prayer I wrote when I was in the program.
A Prayer For Me...

My Dear Keeper,

My loss, my lonely, my mistakes, my bad, my broken, all my should haves left unspoken, are all yours now. Surround me with your comfort and your love. My will is yours. All my problems, all my insecurities are in your hands. I'm just going to make it throught this minute, I'll worry about the next one when it gets here. I can't, You can, It's yours.

Thank you for giving me this life. I know I have complained and acted un-grateful. I now see that you never put anything in front of me that I couldn't handle. I know now that this is my test, my journey. I know that you are there holding my hand.

My wings are still new. I know that you will be there when I take flight into a new area of my life.

Thank you for my guardian angels. I say angels because I know there are more than one. I can feel their love and comfort for me.

Carry me home as the sun kisses the window sill and as I drink my second cup of pity me, you will prove the miracle.

When I stray, I know you will be waiting to guide me back. When I forget, I know you will remind me. When I hurt and when I fall, you will be there to hold me with loving arms. When I laugh, I know you will be there with your warm smile. When I reach for the stars, I know you will be there to lift me up. When I fear, I know you will be there to comfort me.

I'm still learning how to fly. I know you are the wind that will carry me.

Thank you for your unconditional love for me.

My love is yours to keep.

Never again will I forget the trials I have been through, and hopefully, hopefully, I can help others to know that addiction is a daily battle, and everyone needs a little help every now and then.

Counting stars last night reminded me that I am not ready for the cold, but I have to accept that life has it's own little cycle. You can either enjoy the ride, or you can try and keep it from spinning around. I would much rather enjoy the ride.